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April 25, 2013

Therapist Thursday: No One is Perfect

Hi friends,

Again, it has been a while since I have had my last classic "Therapist Thursday" post. Boy are you in for a treat.

As I write this, it is 2:27pm on a Thursday. I am propped up in my cozy bed with my dog at my feet and a hot tea on my night stand. I should be at work still. But, I decided to come home early. No, I'm not sick. At least I don't think I am. I have had a sore throat on and off for about 5 days but I am forcefully telling myself that it is just allergies and it will go away. Reverse psychology, you see. The truth is, I am overwhelmed. (And it just so happens to be the time of the month. Great timing.) For all of you people thinking, "Suck it up, Taylor." Be quiet. I know my limits. I know when it is time to throw in the towel and give my brain and my body a rest. I'm not playing around. The last thing I want is to get sick before my 2 events next week. Yes, I said two. I have two out of my four events for the year all within 5 days of one another. I am prepared for them. In fact, I will kick butt when they get here. But, I will kick butt being rested, calm, and feeling organized.

At lunch today, I decided to pull myself out of the reports I had been staring at all morning and get on my social media outlets. Don't lie. You all do this too. We check Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, blogs, You Tube videos and Instagram. I read a blog and this cute little blonde girl was making this cute little "juicing" drink in her perfect little kitchen. I read it, looked at the pictures, jotted down the recipe and moved on. I got on Pinterest and looked at all the cute pictures of cute *organized* house decor and architecture. I ran across the cute outfit a blogger was modeling, re-pinned a few things and moved on. I logged on Instagram and scrolled through my feed to see the most perfectly laid out outfits, a girl that had taken a picture of her neck wearing that amazing fan necklace from J-Crew that I have been drooling over (yet, can't afford) for two months, a cold Starbucks drink laying out on someone's perfectly organized white, bright, and not cluttered (staged) desk, and tons of cute "selfies" that girls have posted of their outfits of the day. At this point, with the overwhelming mood that I am in, I am clearly annoyed. Now, I must clarify that I am guilty of almost every single one of these Instagram posts. For some reason, what was supposed to be a "relaxing" mind break from work turned me into a depressed, envious and self-esteem lacking girl. I felt imperfect and "not enough." Does that make sense?

Side note: Did y'all count how many times I said the word "cute" in that last paragraph? It was on purpose. I was being a smart aleck.

I need to remind myself that it is OK to be imperfect. I am a very specific person and a relish in control. So, I am not opposed to perfection. It just isn't feasible. Maybe if I didn't have a full time job. Maybe if I had a maid. Maybe if I didn't have to do laundry or cook or grocery shop. Then would I be perfect? The answer is NO. (But, I would be less stressed.)

And why is it that we always want more, more, more? I love Instagram, Pinterest and reading blogs. They are fun and mindless communities. However, these particular outlets always leave me feeling less than satisfied and wanting more. It is important to remember a picture can be made to look perfect. I have sometimes posted a "selfie" outfit of the day (#OOTD) on Instagram and it gets like after like. What you don't see is sometimes the shirt I am wearing has holes under the arm pits, the jeans I am wearing are two sizes too small, and you don't see me from the neck up! Most of the time I am on my third day of not washing my hair and I don't have a lick of makeup on. This is what I am talking about. It is important to realize that we are not perfect! Why is it that we always want more followers? Whether it be through Instagram, our personal blogs, Pinterest boards, Twitter...I could go on and on. Why is it that we think that the more followers we have, the more successful we are? It isn't true at all. I am done thinking that way. Having more followers has a sneaky way of making us feel adequate, desired, loved and praised. But then, once we reach a number that we thought we would never get to, it leaves us greedy wanting more and more. We have got to stop thinking this way. Myself included. It isn't what is important in life.

And it certainly isn't why I blog.

I could have come home from work today, sulked, taken a nap, or stared at the ceiling because it doesn't involve using my brain. Instead, I decided to write to you all. It is like therapy for me. And maybe, by writing this, I will at least reach one person that feels the same way I do and this strikes a chord with them.

By the way, the last thing I want to say before I leave you is that SERIOUSLY(?!?!!!!!) the one day I decide to come home and relax, my apartment building has workers going window to window outside tightening these ugly awnings on a really annoying machine that BEEPS so loud!!!!!!!! Picture it. You all know the classic reverse beeping sound I am talking about. This always happens to me. Now I am going to go take some Tylenol and yell out my balcony to shut that stupid machine lift off and come back another day when I am at work!

6 comments:

  1. Seriously, you are not alone. I feel quite similar on many occasions! I am constantly jealous of people I idolize on social media every day, but it's so worth it to take a step back and realize it's not as important as you may think. Thanks for sharing love, it's great to hear this from another point of view!

    Chelsea

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  2. I definitely can relate whenever I see pictures on social media of things that I want, I get a bit jealous and sour about it. Sometimes I just gotta remind myself of the things that I am fortunate to have!

    Hope your week gets better dear! :)

    Rachel Emma
    Daydream Frenzy

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    1. So glad others can relate. Thanks for stopping by, Rachel! :)

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  3. Girl I hear ya. I rambled about social media and it's effects on me the other day. I feel so different after I spend time on social media versus doing productive things. http://meetingdawn.wordpress.com/2014/01/17/social-media-ramblings/

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    1. It's a tough world out there! :) I agree with you. Thanks for stopping by and commenting. :)

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